An Open Letter to My Future Husband: Why I Wait
Dear Future Husband,
I want to save myself for you–not just my virginity, but all of me. My heart, my kisses, my flirtations, my love–I want it to be yours, all yours, and no other man's. So do not be hurt or angry when I hold back from kissing you or playing flirtatious games – it is because I love you so much that I ask you to wait. I want to be sure that I am saving myself for you, my future husband, and not someone else who I temporarily think is you.
I want you to be my first and my last. I want to experience it all with you, however awkward or inexperienced I may be. So if I am awkward when it comes to physical contact, know that it is because I have been saving myself for you and am not used to being touched or being extremely close to a man. I may be awkward, but it is because I love you and try to carefully protect my gift to you. When I look back on my first kiss, I want it to be your smile staring back at me in my memory. I want my first kiss to mean something to me ten years after it happens because it was with you, not something I regret and wish I could take back.
I want to save my words of love and terms of endearment for you. When I say, “I love you,” I want to mean it forever and never regret saying it. I want to save these letters to you, these pieces of my heart for you. They are pieces of myself that I want you alone to know and be familiar with.
I used to think it was hard to love you when I do not even know if I have met you yet or not, but I have learned that I can love you without knowing you through my actions. My waiting is for you, so please be patient with me if I need time to think things over, because if I choose you, I choose you forever. Once you have me, you've got me for life, and I want to make sure that we'll both be happy and both be good for each other. I want it to feel like when I give you everything on our wedding day–all that I have, all that I am–I am not losing anything but rather gaining something.
I will be waiting for you and all of our firsts.
Love always,
Me
